Monday, July 29, 2013

The Wingman Chronicles by James Holeva


James Holeva, aka "The Wingman," is as classy as he is crass. His life
is a dirty ride of uncouth adventures involving weddings, proms,
threesomes, soccer moms, models, strippers, balconies, bedrooms,
backseats and bathroom stalls. No details are spared in this humorous,
erotic, autobiographical novel depicting all of his hedonistic
debauchery. Full of jaw-dropping moments, gut-busting laughs and
multiple orgasms, "The Wingman Chronicles" will make you laugh and
orgasm at the same time.

Fast paced, in your face, and offensive, this swaggering young player degrades with class while providing a message to the world, "Don't ever let anybody stifle your adventure."


Where has James been my whole life? seriously I kinda maybe want to be one of his skags now for a couple different reasons. One being that he clearly takes eating pussy as serious as an Ethiopian finally eating a meal and another being that he's fucking hilarious and obviously knows how to work the P-rod that he was gifted with. But here's the seller for me HOLY FUCKING SHIT this book was hilarious! I read this book in a few short hours as I lay upon my death bed knowing that I'm surely dying. Okay, maybe I'm not really dying but I've been burdened with the "summer flu" and for someone that RARELY gets sick I thought for sure that I was dying. Yes, I'm a bit over dramatic. Anywho by the time I finished reading this book I had broken a sweat and my fever had started to go away. I'm going to thank James Holeva for that one because this book was HAWT! There's a lot of sex. When i say a lot of sex i mean that I ALMOST feel my catholic school days creeping back up on me and I kind of want to confess my sins but since I already know that I'm hell bound I won't. Anyways this book is all from a "players" point of view.  This book is not only gritty and raw but absolutely fucking hilarious. Seriously, I had to stop highlighting parts of this book because it was taking me longer to highlight than it was to read.

"Not to brag, but I eat box like a lesbian pornstar."

How the fuck do you not laugh at that? You don't not laugh at that because that shit is fucking hilarious. Moving on. So 
we all know that I'm basically a dude trapped in the body of a woman. Or partly woman, my lack of tits kinda makes it iffy but my vag is proof. Point being that we all know I'm a perv. I heart the fuck out of sex and orgasms BUT there was one particular scene in this book that grossed me out. Yes, even I have my limits and had I lived in the hollers of Kentucky I may have been okay with it but it really just kind of grossed me out. Which brings me back to the hilarity of this book because despite my aversion to this particular scene, I still laughed. A LOT!  

Now here is where I'm confused. People are comparing this book the FSoG. Why the fuck are they comparing it to Fifty? I can assure you that besides some ass smacking and hard core fucking this book is NOTHING like FSoG. In fact I personally would be more inclined to takes James' hard eight for a spin than I would be to deal with a broody Christian, mostly because James is hilarious and I like to laugh. I would more likely compare this to book to every single National Lampoon movie that has ever been made and all of The Hangover movies but with a "Player" romcom-esque twist. Actually I'm not even sure that's a good comparison. But if you like to laugh and you like sex then I would definitely recommend this book. Also if you are sick and running a fever I would recommend this book because I'm certain that this book is the reason my fever broke. Yes its that hot. There were parts of this book that had me drooling from both ends. Go go go and buy your copy of The Wingman Chronicles now! 

Steph's Review
What? I built a pillow wall”….. This is the exact moment my school girl crush began on James: the sexy, witty, 5’9”, pussy devouring, uterus bruising (8” bitches, that’s right!) comedian.
** Sighs** Shit…… My cheeks hurt. My abs are sore. My libido is calibrated to HIGH. I just finished reading The Wingman Chronicles. This was one of the fucking funniest and most entertaining books, while still being sexy, that I have ever read! It explores several of James’ sexual conquests with lusty humor. TWC will have ladies everywhere bending over grabbing their ankles while begging to be called a whore. 
James Holeva, the self-proclaimed “Player” is much more than just a player. Players, play games. Not James. He uses his seductive charm and wit to get in those panties. To me, James is “The Prince of Pussy” aka “The Pussy Whisperer” aka “Coochie Casanova” aka “Vagina Vigilante” aka “The Cunt Charmer”. Infinite possibilities….. You see where I am going with this? The man knows his way around vagina(s)! 
Some of my favorite quotes and such: “Damn drunken whores and their ADD”
“ Eat em’ for twenty and you can fuck em’ for two…That’s how you get the stud status.”

“You know I’d throw any of you broads a ride on the bologna pony if it wasn’t for the fact it might kill you”

With a couple of inches on me, and a couple more in heels, the possessive pussy hound towered over me.

If I fucked Cousin Sue with the gap teeth or Aunt Terri with the black teeth, that’d be mildly frowned upon, but I fucked a high class relative.

If you don’t like reading about big cocks, dirrrty fuckery and cum facials this might not be the book for you. But I do. With that being said, I LOVED every single page of this book. My kitty is purring, craving more. TWC will make you want to let your inner whore out to play.

I give this book 5+ Stars! Go one click this funny as hell - sexy as sin book! 
Tell a friend…. Trust me, she will thank you!


1. I still want to know where the fuck you've been all my life? 
Doing research. Yes, that kind of research.

2. Eating pussy. True enjoyment or just a means to the end?
True enjoyment as long as she doesn't have a ZZ Top concert between her lets.

3. Tits or ass? 
Depends on the tits or ass. I have a true appreciation for both because they make my dick hard but I'm gonna have to say overall I'm an ass man.

4. If you had to pick either sex or blow jobs to refrain from for a year, which would it be and why?
I'd refrain from sex. Blowjobs are always better. When you're a teenager it's a big deal for girl's to give it up so you're getting blowjobs all the time, then you get into your early twenties and the girls have had sex a few more times and they're like "This is pretty good. I'm not blowing anybody. Fuck me." I had a streak in my early twenties where I was getting laid all the time, but no blowjobs. The broad would be be down there, playing with my cock, I'd be all excited that she was gonna blow me then she'd come up and say "Fuck me." I'd be like, "Again? Fine!" Since around my 24th birthday the tide shifted and I wealth of girls who felt empowered with a dick in their mouth so I've been getting an endless amount of blowjobs. Sometimes four girls sucking it at a time, and sometimes two blowjobs in an hour (but you know that.)

5. Have you ever took one for the team? Did you enjoy it, even though she wasn't all that hot? Ever hook up with her again?
I have done things that would make you vomit for days. I have done things that the very thought of would make you want to stop having sex. The key is to look at every score as a score for the team. My grandfather once told me, he was in the hospital and he just had his second heart attack and he said, "James, I wish I fucked the ugly ones too." Hook up with her again? Fuck no. I'm successful now and it just wouldn't be right.

6. Most embarrising moment? Sexually or in general.
Being drunk and throwing up on my mom. It wasn't sexual as far as I know.

7. I want you to tell me your wildest and most dirty sex filled escapade. This can either be a fantasy or a true story. Then I will guess if it is true or not. You read my book. Which do you think is the dirtiest and wildest? 
Yes, there are others but I'm not ready to give away the entire Wingman Chronicles series just yet!

8. How many threesomes have you had? 
I'd say about a dozen or so.

9. During any of your threesomes, have you ever liked fucking one girl better than the other? How did you handle that? Does anyone ever feel left out????
Yes. I showed the one I liked greater attention. The other girl felt left out which made her want me even more. So then I let my favorite girl stroke me off and blew my load on the reject's face as the favorite cheered me onto degrade the other girl. It would have only been more fun if they were sisters. Twin sisters would have been even better.

10. Have you ever "switched positions" and had the girl be the aggressor? Did you like it?
Somewhat yes, I like when a girl comes at me and dominates a little. That's fun, but you can't let it get too out of hand or they'll go for inanimate objects to stick up my ass. A lot of women are sick fucks.

11. You seem to like bondage, do you have a red room of pain? If so, Can I see it??? 
I do not have a red room of pain and a lot of girls ask why I don't have sex toys. The thing is I live in New York City and we take the train or cabs when we go out, and I prefer not bring girl's back to my apartment because I don't want them to steal anything, and most clubs don't have sex toy checks. It's hard enough to find a coat check and they usually don't let you cart your portable torture chamber onto the dance floor. I do keep a ball gag with me though in case I'm hooking up with a Jewish girl.

12. Do you prefer a sweet and innocent lady (that you have to teach) or a wild and dirty whore (that you might learn a few trick from)? And why?
A wild, dirty, classy whore. A girl who looks polished and sexy, but is smoken' hot, and is a freak in the bedroom, backseat or bathroom stall. I want to learn, as long as my ass isn't learning anything.

13. What ever happend to Noelle? She ever ride that bologna pony again?
You really want me to give away my next book don't you?

14. Why don't you like having your ass licked? It's such an easy transition for her to move from the beast, to the balls, to the ass. The shitter has so many nerve endings in it. Makes it sensitive. I think you would like if you tried it. Or if you have tried it and didn't like it, that bitch wasn't doing it right.
I don't have complete confidence in my wiping abilities. Actually, I have gotten more opened to the ass licking and I kind of like it. Not so much because of the way it feels but it's hot how it degrades the girl.
15. blonds or brunettes?
I don't judge a girl by the color of her hair, I judge her by the size of her tits and ass and how good her blowjobs are. Unless of course she has short hair in which case she could call me when it grows back.

16. how do you prefer your twat. Bald, landing strip or a forest?
I'm equally down with bald or landing but I'm bouncing if she has a ZZ Top concert between her legs.



You can find more on James Holeva at:

Here's the trailer from James' Pilot "The Wingman" that won best pilot at the 2013 Hoboken International Film Festival.

James wrote, starred and produced. Louis Vanaria, who played Crazy Mario in "A Bronx Tale" and Lucien Delessio in "Boardwalk Empire" co-stars.

Video excerpt from the book.

And a sample excerpt

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